Frequently asked questions

A sponsor can take many forms. In PAA, a sponsor's primary goal is to take their sponsee through the Twelve Steps.

They can certainly take on other roles with their sponsee. At the time of writing there is a shortage of sponsors in the program; the hope is that more people get through all of the Steps so that they are then able to work the Twelfth Step by sponsoring others and walking them through the Steps in turn. PAA's own guidance is at parec.org.

The best way is to attend meetings and find like-minded members who share and are active in the community. As you get to know other members of the fellowship, natural connections grow. From there, simply ask someone whom you feel would make a good sponsor.

Not everyone is in a place where they can take on a sponsee, and they may say no. Don't be discouraged. It only means the right sponsor for you hasn't been found yet.

If you've joined the PAA Discord server, you can find members with the “Open to Sponsor” role in the #sponsorship channel. Introduce yourself and use the @Open to sponsor tag so that available sponsors are alerted.

There is plenty available to you as a newcomer while you look:

• Find an accountability partner (or more than one).
• Read the SAA Green Book.
• Define your Three Circles.
• Work the Steps on your own.
• Attend meetings.
• Use the outreach channels on WhatsApp and Discord.

The Third Tradition of PAA says: The only requirement for PAA membership is a desire to stop using pornography in all of its forms. So if the desire is there, until you find a sponsor, do everything you can to refrain from using pornography.

An accountability partner is someone who helps another member stay honest and responsible in their efforts to avoid pornography and related compulsive behaviors. Some characteristics:

• Mutual support. Both people check in regularly — daily or weekly — to share progress, challenges, triggers, and victories.
• Not a sponsor. A sponsor offers structured guidance through the Twelve Steps; an accountability partner is an equal, walking alongside rather than leading.
• Honesty and transparency. The relationship is built on open, honest communication, especially about slips, urges, or risky behaviors.
• Boundaries and respect. Healthy accountability is encouragement, not control. It isn't policing; it's a mutual commitment to recovery.

On the official PAA meeting calendar. We don't publish them here so that they stay current and the rooms stay safe. Each meeting page on this site tells you the day and time.